AshesToAshes » Background

Polly

jackiehoysted — Wed, 08 Apr 2009 01:14:27 +0000

Polly quit on April 1st and sent me a great package via Fedex with her last cigarette and extra “materials”. Take a look – it was great and now I’m under serious pressure to prepare a Temple of Honor that matches these awesome packages I’m receiving from such wonderful people. Here are some (bad) photos of Polly’s hard work.

Polly "Last Cigarette" package

Madison!

jackiehoysted — Mon, 09 Mar 2009 01:17:13 +0000

I had yet another new package in the mail on Saturday – this time from Madison. Her quit day was Feb. 24th and she is working hard on keeping that quit. Good for her.

This is her goodbye letter and a picture of the package she sent me.

dear smokes,

i am going to miss the feeling of you between my lips. i am going to miss the ‘relaxation’ feeling you always gave me. i am going to miss having you for my comfort zone. i am going to miss sharing you with friends. i am going to miss the fun times of flicking you out the window trying to hit a mud puddle. i am going to miss your ashes in my ashtrays. i am going to miss throwing your empty pkgs away. i am going to miss your butt for other reasons as well. thats only to name a few. but most of all and most importantly, i have got to leave you behind. i am making new changes and there is no way i can let you come with me. i’m sorry. i have chest pains which i know i never had when i quit. i can have cleaner teeth, fresher breath, shinier hair, more friends, i can have it all, money in my pocket, new clothes in my closet, new CD’s on my dresser, candy on my chair where your ashtray sits, i can get a hair cut, new shoes, i can walk to the library for books to keep you away from me (and i’ll get a lawyer if i have to), my home wont be smoky smelling, i can do a lot of things that i cant do with you as my friend. so i guess what i am saying here, gosh this is hard, is goodbye. i just dont love you anymore. i dont need you anymore. i fell in love with someone else. i love me, madison! i now need to care for me not anyone else. just me.
bye

Madison also had her ‘burial’ service for her last cigarettes and this is her obituary to them:

GENERIC UVALL BRANDS

Generic Uvall Brands, 27, of Florida, formerly of Sandwich and Sheridan, Il passed away on Tuesday, July 29,2008 at home after a long battle with cancer. He was born June 30, 1981 to Misty Light (Long) and Marlboro (‘Red’) Long and was loved very much by his adoptive parents Awl Brands and Menny More.
He will be remembered for his chemical dependancy by his special partners Bic and Cricket Lighters.
He is survived by his non-smoking wife, Madison, his sons Kool and Camel, his daughters Virginia Slim and Misty Menthol.
He is proceeded in death by his cousins Terreyton, and Viceroy, and an Uncle GPC & mother-in law, Doral.

Funeral services will be held on Wednesday July 30, 2008 at the Florida Fake Funeral Home of Oak Tree Ground near Roots at 9:00 a.m. Upon his request, there will be no prior visitation. Memorials may be directed to cigarette companies of your choice. In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to FFS at ALA

*All available information is given here, please do not call and ask any questions. He really wont be missed by many.

Thanks Madison!

Shirley

jackiehoysted — Wed, 04 Mar 2009 02:16:48 +0000

I got a new package in the mail yesterday from Shirley. What a surprise – not the fact that she sent me her last cigarette (she had promised that to me a long time ago) but the entire contents – her last half smoked cigarette, a beautiful letter to me, printouts from modules from the AMerican Lung Association quit smoking modules, her reasons for stopping stopping, her goodbye letter to cigarettes, words from her daughter that she has posted on her fridge, her track pack exercises from the ALA too and some post it notes that she pasted everywhere.

Shirley quit on 1.27.09 and is a fantastic quitter.

Here is a few snapsshots of what she sent me. I felt kind of bad having Shirley’s “post it” notes so I thought it would be nice to post to them here for her to see.

Thanks Shirley! DDA – Desire Determination Action

Tribute to Betty

jackiehoysted — Sun, 08 Feb 2009 16:38:04 +0000

Betty sent me her Goodbye Letter a few weeks ago and I’ve made the artwork below for her. I didn’t have her last cigarette so I included some packaging for Marlboro Ultra Lights – the brand that Betty smoked. The artwork is not as “clean cut” as the earlier ones but I think it works well and it is heavily influenced by the words in Betty’s goodbye letter – the words “I thought you were my friend, But were my enemy” are haunting and prompted a more forceful response in the imagery in the artwork. I think it is more reminiscent of a mausoleum than a temple and I think subconsciously I wanted to emphasize that there is no going back – no more smoking – and that is why I tied the poles and barred up the symbolic doorway.

Goodbye Letter to Cigarettes

jackiehoysted — Tue, 20 Jan 2009 02:28:18 +0000

Betty has a wonderful quit going and she has sent her goodbye letter to me to create an artwork to add to my wall of honor. She quit on October 20th, 2008 – good for her. Her 3 month quit date is tomorrow – Congratulations Betty!

Betty’s Goodbye Letter:

GOODBYE CIGARETTES:

I will miss my early morning coffee with you.

I will miss leaning on you when I have a problem.

I won’t miss the way you make me feel.

I won’t miss coughing, being out of breath, wheezing, the lung infections.

I thought you were my friend, but you were the enemy.

I won’t miss the mess you leave behind (dirty house & car).

I won’t miss all the trips to the store just to buy you.

I will be glad to have the money I will save by not buying you.

You Really do stink!

Betty -

Temple for Erica

jackiehoysted — Mon, 25 Aug 2008 12:54:41 +0000

Erica has 7 weeks today – I hope you like the artwork to celebrate that achievement. Once again I used the temple format, used the gauze, bells, nails etc as a visual language to describe the experience of quitting i.e. one of celebration , death (of old habits, dependancies, beliefs), healing and renewal, with temptation always lurking around.

Busy Busy

jackiehoysted — Fri, 22 Aug 2008 01:00:08 +0000

I can’t believe it – my thirteen month project has drawn to an end and I am happily smokefree – it is pretty hard to believe. I have to decide now what to do – I feel I should continue with the project because there is so much I want to do with regard to smoking in general. I’m planning on applying for some grants again to see if I can make my project more ambitious and turn it into an installation. Fingers crossed that I succeed.

In the meantime I have been working on Erica’s last cigarette and here is a work-in-progress picture. After nearly pulling my hair out a few times today with it, it is finally done. I’ll post the finished product on Monday when Erica celebrates her 7 week anniversary. Congratulations Erica – you are doing great!

How do you make someone’s day?

jackiehoysted — Tue, 08 Jul 2008 23:11:01 +0000

Erica made my day! Today I received a new cigarette in the mail from a new buddy from The American Lung Association. I had no idea that Erica had sent it and of course I was thrilled. Her package was wonderful and I especially liked the card that she wrote on.

Erica – stay strong and hang in – you WILL do it and thank you so much!

Rolling on 7.30pm 2008

jackiehoysted — Tue, 08 Jul 2008 22:35:40 +0000

At 7.30 pm tonight I will have have quit smoking over 1 year ago. WOW! That’s me I’m talking about – who would have thought that. It is SO good to be free of cigarettes – free of addiction! Although I have to careful as I say that because I will always be addicted – I am free while I never take one puff!

WOW for me and a HUGE thankyou to everyone who helped me on the way, especially those who helped me this this project.

To celebrate I want to post a poem by Brian Schild. Brian has given me wonderful encouragement throughout the year and I am honored to have his permission to reproduce his poem here. Also known as The Cancer Poem, Brian explains “This is a poem about my feelings and images I felt soon after I found out my father would die of cancer back in 1996. The photo represents my mothers death when I was 6, she was 34.”

Two Churches

It is dusk. I step off the bus.
I just have to walk three blocks West.
I can see the dark blue steeple
silhouette of
Saint Mary of Czestochowa across the street from my house. Huge
thunder clouds are rapidly moving in from the North.
The yellowed sliver of a moon-an eye
ready to close forever,
hovers hopefully next to the church-
already practically buried in clouds. I
pick up the pace. I do not mind getting wet but
the lighting frightens me.
Lighting will take away everything.

I make it home before the downfall
of rain. Everthing is locked up,
the shades are pulled down.

I have a photograph from years ago.
A different summer, a different thunder cloud, even a different church steeple, Saint Casimir, located about six
blocks away.
Moving
clouds obscure then illuminate the blinking moon.

1996

Thanks Brian for all your encouragement and support!

My Last Cigarette

jackiehoysted — Wed, 19 Mar 2008 19:01:49 +0000

I finally incorporated my last cigarette in a piece of art. Again I followed the temple format denoting simple columns and a frieze. The frieze is decorated with 25 burned matches representing the 25 years or so that I smoked and although I had many “left over” cigarettes I only used one with a nail through it. I also included a photograph taken of me smoking about 15 years ago. I actually like that photograph (I don’t like many photographs of me) – it was taken in a restaurant in Italy and I’m younger and look fresher. I transferred a copy of the photograph to wax paper and a scroll nailed onto the artwork. I wanted it to denote a time gone by, something in the past, the end of something.
I’ve been a non-smoker for eight months now and glad that I have quit. I was at home, in Ireland, for a week recently and I have to say that I didn’t think of a cigarette in all that time. However since I’ve been back I have thought about it more and am now questioning whether working on this project is prolonging withdrawal symptoms.